“It is pretty scary to start school, especially on opening day, so I try to keep them from crying, help them feel more comfortable at school.”
“Climate change is going to destroy this island if we don’t do something fast,” the Martha’s Vineyard Equity Council said. “This wall nothing to do with keeping the brownies out.”
Five hours of waiting for his wife to get ready proved to be too much for a White River Junction man, Fake News reporter Johnny Bananas reports.
Now that Big Tech social media platforms are cracking down on the use of the word ‘groomer,’ the Babylon Bee offers helpful alternatives.
“The President has taken every precaution possible to ensure that his dearly beloved olfactory nerve remains healthy,” said White House physician Dr. Elliot Reed.
“The anti-choice Underground Railroad didn’t know what’s best for them like we Democrats do,” Sen. Warren said. “We should have shut this down across the country.”
Over the course of several hours, we learned that some rioters tried to destroy our democracy by entering the Capitol Building and taking selfies and putting their booted Nazi feet upon Nancy Pelosi’s sacred desk.